A Nugget of Life Haiku: Is There Hope?

TDC1517. Life, A User’s Manual, by Georges Perec. I haven’t read it. I’m just winging it. I’ve been advised to throw out the manual.

This little nugget below is probably in there though. I’ve been worried about this forever. If we are constantly finding and skipping all the good stones, the nice round flat ones, they’ll all be gone and there will be none left to skip for future generations. You all know the feeling of victory and the promise of many bounces that you hold in your hands when you find a great one. Every one of those beauties you find and skip diminishes the world’s potential for skips. That is saddening. Even worse if you throw it and eff it up and only get like two skips.

Maybe someone with some entrepreneurial spirit should get a snorkel, jump in the lake and start bringing some of those little pancakes back to shore. Maybe all hope is not lost.

Skipping Stones

Impossible Dogs

Is it impossible, though? Grandpa may have been from Siberia, but this Husky is all about Libraria. Inspired by Grant Snider’s Impossible Dogs artwork, Daily Create 1516 has asked us to create an impossible new breed of dog. Here’s your new buddy, who doesn’t get you in trouble when you bring books back late: The Librarian Husky. He’ll even lick your stamps for you. It’s a side job of his.

 

Tree Seed The Stars

When you’re a silly person, Daily Creates (TDC1515) like this one, that obviously call for some response on a deeper more meaningful level, are trouble. This Daily Create is not asking for something trite. But I’m all about the trite! So I’m embracing the trite. Make a drawing with a tree, a seed and a star joining to create an image together. I look forward to other’s responses on that deeper more meaningful level. But for me and my MS Painting skills, that were cultivated over many years of very occasional half-hearted use, here’s what you get: A barely anthropomorphic tree who saw the stars. He did see them. He see’d them. And the tree’s happy little cowboy friend with the cool vest see’d them, too. Sorry.

Sparking a Story

Daily Create today (TDC1514) is to create a story and a collage. I haven’t created a collage since the 1800s. Let’s see if I still don’t got it.

By the way thanks for the help, Story Spark! You’re so random! You gave me so much inspiration. Well, really you did all the work by providing the story type, character description, occupation, action, 2nd character description, 2nd occupation and setting. But that’s all, I did the rest! When I began searching for pictures though, I find that my brain is completely and utterly only able to think in terms of a sitcom right now. Thanks Fuller House! Can anyone tell me why I can’t stop watching Fuller House???? Now songs from Growing Pains are stuck in my head and I just thought about Golden Girls and Facts of Life for no apparent reason. 2016 is weird. Enjoy my collage! Also I don’t know what the word avenge really means.

 

 

 

Math: Western Style

image

It’s 1832 and 22% of the western US of A is 78% lawless. Your gang of 5 outlaws is planning a train robbery that, if caught, could put your gang being bars for 15-20 years. If the lawlessness rate is diminishing by 6% a year and you need 6 months to plan your train heist, what is the probability that your gang will get away Scott free?
Show your work.TDC1511

New Album from Proto-Post Industrial Metapunk Stalwarts Hortapharm B.V.

This album cover made itself using the forces of randomosity and guidance from DS106 assignment bank

Step 1: Random Wikipedia Page Generator sends me to a pharmaceutical company focusing on Cannabis. Good start! Hortapharm B.V. is formed!

Step 2: Album name comes from a few words of the last quote on whatever page this link takes you to. This just happened to be a quote from Lady Gaga. I took the last 5 words: “Sequins Represent a Good Time“. Certainly couldn’t do any better with my own imagination.

Step 3: Get picture for album cover from an interesting Flickr page. Supposed to pick the 3rd one, but I took the 4th. Because it was weird enough for a weird band. Done. Created. I can hear it already.

AlbumCover

Caillou, Open Range Bastion

TriplerollCaillou

My attempts at triple trolling always seem to end up a 2 vs. 1 situation. See, for example, how I unfairly pitted Joe Strummer against Justin Bieber and Nickelchad. I’m sorry again, Joe. This time it’s another unfair fight as Caillou and Mark Zuckerberg join annoying forces against BBQ Bill Shankelbean and, by extension, openness. We need a new word for this. Juxtaposing doesn’t quite cut it. More like juxtaimposing, amirite? tdc1509

Intra-Provincial Travelling Blues

Play the audio above as you listen to this tale of woe. And read slowly to get the full effect.

audio courtesy of: Sound Transit

All Canadians know, in order to travel from one place to another in the same province, whether it be as tiny as Prince Edward Island or as huge as Quebec or Ontario, you have to travel via Moffat, Scotland. The reason for this is no one noticed Brian Mulroney, who owns Moffat Industries in Moffat, Scotland, put the requirement in the Charlottetown Accord and then snuck it in the Charter of Rights and Freedoms for good measure. It’s actually written in pink highlighter on the back.

So it was, and as you are hearing, when I found myself heading from Montreal, Quebec to Vallee Bras Du Nord, Also Quebec, I had to take a small plane across the Atlantic, Canoe back and then hike through knee deep maple leaves just to get there. And by the time I finally arrived in Vallee Bras Du Nord, I had forgotten why I wanted to go there in the first place, so I headed right back to Montreal via Moffat. tdc1508

Triple Troll

The Triple Troll, in spirit, is meant to irritate fans of three different things at once. This one went in a little bit of a different direction. This one will only irritate one fandom and the others won’t care at all. They are nihilists. They are too exhausted.

I trolled myself really, in the end. At first it was all ‘ha, ha, hoo, hoo’ put Bieber lyrics on a Nickelchad picture…hahahaha…. But then it got dark by adding two wonderful words: Joe Strummer. I’m sorry Joe. You said the future is unwritten. Does that mean we can unwrite this?